Communication

Archive for March, 2010

This sounds like an essay question that you need to answer but your particular answer to this question really resonates into your inner being. It reflects your inner value system on how much importance you put into your current relationship.

This article will emphasize the fact on the priority level that you should put communication in a relationship and what benefits you can get from the right type of communication if you put an effort into understanding yourself and your significant other.

Why is communication important in a relationship directly results into the longevity of the relationship. Do you want it to last or is this just a fling for the time being?

The information that you are about to read will help you understand your relationship a little bit better and allow you to be able to cope with most situations that are considered stressful.

Sooner or later your partner will say or do something that is contrary to your outlook on life. The immediate response to those words or actions is to get mad and let her know about your feelings right away. Sure you might be right in getting it off your chest and letting her know how you feel about the issue. But when you are in an agitated state, that is not the time to get your point across.

You need to gain control over your emotional self. If you don’t gain control you probably will end up in a big argument that will last for days instead of minutes.

One technique to gain control is to breathe. I mean take 3 deep breaths from your diaphragm and exhale thinking of nothing. By the time you’ve exhaled 3 times you should be in a state of relaxation and out of the emotional state that you previously were in.

Now when you are cool, calm and relaxed you are better able to handle yourself if your spouse has issues with you. But you are in control of yourself and you will can communicate more effectively.

Now that you are emotionally calmed down you can talk about the specific action or words that got you upset in the first place. Talk about the situation in the I mode. That is pertain the issue to how you feel and how the words or actions affected you. It could be that you had a bad experience and her words or actions ignited the experience all over again.

If you start talking with saying you in your explanations, that will put the other person on the defensive and you start all over again. But staying within yourself, controlled and calm letting her know about your feelings will go a mile in understanding.

If you want a relationship to last then communication is one of the primary goals that you should be striving for.

Email is the primary way businesses communicate, as well as how people interact with friends. But there are important differences between the style and content of these types of emails. The following are some tips to help you communicate appropriately on business email.

1. Be careful what you say in emails. Remember that this is still professional communication. Re-read your emails before you send them to ensure you have been professional.

2. Make sure you know your company policy about email communication so you are not caught out with personal email. Some companies will ban social networking sites. Some prohibit personal email on company computers. If you know the policy, you won’t make mistakes.

3. Business communication is for recording, transferring or communicating information. It should not be overly emotional or full of non-factual information. It should be clear, concise and easy to understand

4. Business communication should also express thoughts in a careful way. Think before you write, and think again before you send.

5. If the email is particularly important, it may be beneficial to get someone else to read it before sending to a wider group. Often someone else will see flaws in your approach, and change the wording to be more objective.

6. Business email should also protect confidentiality of the business, so be aware of what you are sending externally.

7. Question whether you need an email at all. Would this be better done through a phone call or a meeting? If you think you are emotional about the issue, speaking about it can be better than writing so your thoughts are not captured in an email which may jeopardise your position later.

8. Always state facts objectively, as opposed to your feelings on the matter. You can express an opinion but back it up with facts and not emotion.

9. Don’t be abusive on email. Always use professional language.

10. There is a difference between knowing something and hearing about something. Be sure you get your facts right. Don’t gossip on work email.

11. Leave out irrelevant information from your communications. People are busy now so just state what is necessary.

12. Make sure email headers contain enough information so people know what they are about to read.

13. It is best to avoid humour and sarcasm in email as it doesn’t cross the medium well, especially if someone has a different sense of humour to you. Certain types of humour can also be considered harassment, so just avoid it in workplace communication.

14. Defamation is when untrue information is communicated that could damage someone’s reputation. This can sometimes be mistakenly done on email.

15. Never email anything you don’t want that person to read – as chances are, they will end up seeing it even if they are not on the original mailing list.

16. Email lasts forever. Even if you think you have deleted it, it can be pulled from the backups.

17. Email is not always private. Assume it can be seen or accessed easily.

18. Be careful if you communicate with your lawyer by e mail. In certain countries, doing so could result in the loss of the attorney-client privilege, since an e mail can be read by someone other than the attorney or client more easily than other forms of communication.

19. Protect access to your computer and to your email accounts. Someone could send an email from your address that could jeopardise your position.

20. Be careful of clicking “reply to all”. Do all those people really need to see your comments. Only copy people in if they need to be part of the decision/ communication.

21. No copyrighted material should be transmitted unless you first obtain permission from the copyright owner. If you’re ever not sure if sending an e mail attachment will violate copyright laws, ask your company’s law department.

22. When emailing a member of the opposite sex, keep all written business communication professional. Don’t flirt by email as this can easily be found out by others.

Learning to communicate effectively is a life-long process. Often it is a combination of trial and error and learning the hard way. This process contributes-sometimes positively and at other times negatively–to perceptions of ourselves and others. Patterns and habits of communication develop from childhood and are carried well into adulthood and old age. These habits are so subconscious that much of the time we have no realistic idea of how we are perceived by others.

People communicate in the best way they know and do not realize when and how they are failing to convey their intended message. When it is understood that the message is not clear, it is not a matter of blaming the past or making excuses; rather, it involves the maturity to recognize and change the elements of your communication that are not serving you well for those that are more effective. It is a matter of saying or thinking: ‘No matter what has happened in the past, do I want this pattern or behavior now’? ‘It is my choice to behave, react, respond differently and now I choose to do it another way.’ ‘Past is past; I cannot go on behaving the way I have in the past and expect anything other than the responses I evoked in the past’. There is a saying: When you think the way you have always thought, you will act the way you have always acted and you will get what you have always got.

The word, communication, in itself tells a story. It is derived from the Latin word communis meaning common. Some other words derived from this root are community, communion and communitarian. We communicate by creating common ground with those to whom we speak. When that is established a sense of community is begun and then followed by something greater than the whole; a spirit of community, which by some might be termed a kind of communion. The result of community spirit is the fostering and nurturing of people who co-operate, form effective teams, become friends and can be called communitarians.

Developing a sense of community is important in the day to day running of a business. This is difficult when business executives today are in so many meetings that there is barely time for desk work. These sessions consist of everything from one to one discussions to committee meetings. It might be said that a typical executive day consists of wall-to-wall people, talking, brainstorming, organizing and facilitating. Those with good communication skills and an understanding of the importance of the business community soon develop a rapport with their colleagues. This fosters and creates a pleasant atmosphere where support and a sense of ease and co-operation are predominant. The result is good team building and focus on the projects and aims of the day rather than personal issues that arise because there is a perceived lack of support or dialog.

The successful business person knows these things well and practices them at every opportunity. By focusing on the project or aim everyone can gain. The moment, the focus is on individual issues, the project suffers with delays, poor quality attention, and perhaps cancellation. Good communication skills are needed by everyone to see that the work gets done in good spirit.

In today’s marketplace, on a scale of one to ten, skills and talents and assets acquire the number one place whereas character is sifted down to the very bottom of the pile. It’s mainly because character is weighty.

Yes, because it needs depth and a lot of work. Today we have instant coffee and instant microwave stuff and the instant glory is what many are after just for fame and recognition. Once achieved there is a struggle to either maintain or a breakdown in some area of the individual’s life which could be financial, social, personal or anything-al and eventually affects his life, and who he is.

Which brings me back to character. For communication today we learn that we need to have the language and the soft skills right. Which is good. I would like to add a few that I think are pretty basic but VERY NECESSARY to be successful in communication.

Being SECURE in what you do reflects how you communicate WHAT you do. Security in who you are at your work reflects in your communication.

A feeling of insecurity leaves you half-hearted and you sound half-hearted over the phone or even in a live conversation. You may sound happy and speak with a smile on your face but it would be very plastic. Not from deep within.

When you know WHO you are and WHERE you are going it builds in you a self -respect and a self-confidence that won’t allow you to dress up or put on a front for others….and eventually lose that self-respect. Being who you are is important. But you have got to love yourself in that case.

If you are not comfortable with your own character and feel guilty about yourself, you are carrying around that dislike within you which reflects in your communication. Stay comfortable with yourself and if you get uncomfortable always get it right. With God, with yourself, with whoever…it’s totally up to you.

Joy, I believe comes from within. From being who you are. Happiness comes from what is on the outside – your circumstances and your friends and family. If you were left alone on this earth, would you be happy with yourself… why are some people constantly joyful?

Be a person who wants to give more than wanting to get. I tell you, it helps. Build your character. Something happens when you give of yourself. It doesn’t mean you should open up yourself to abuse.

Believe in what you do. It will help you communicate much farther. You will reach a level of communication that exceeds your information on the subject and will allow you to be so animated in the process it will infect the other person or people around you.

Choose to not get offended and hurt. It’s your choice. Ultimately, EVERYTHING in your life is your choice. Except maybe your family. Smile.

Be so secure that even if the world around you is collapsing, you have what it takes. Not over-confidence and pride, but security, joy, self-respect for yourself & people.

You will communicate well.

Effective communication is essential for the smooth functioning of a company and today, walls that prevent information flow from top-down; bottom-up or department-to-department in organizations has all disappeared. With walls gone and effective communication in place, information permeates the company.

Still in many organization, communication flows through narrow channels and usually only from top-down. In this scenario, if you want to have effective communication:

You have to be in the right place at the right time even for a small piece of information
You have to be high enough in the company
You have to be in the in right group and fight for every scrap of information that you need to do your job.

Without free flow of effective communication, people in the company are left to work in an information vacuum where every division and department is a closed information loop. If you look around, you may see plenty of barriers in your company that need to be dismantled.

It could be door to the manager office that remains closed to communication from your employees
Or it could be the rigid boundary between daily rated and salaried employees that kept people from communicating freely with one another.
Mindsets of individual managers are most resistant to change and must be change.

As a company manager, you need to effectively communicate with your entire network of departments and have your employee the vantage point to see the direction that has been set by you as you have to grow the business, make money and take a lot of risk that would not guarantee that it will pay off in the long run.

This can be a tall order if effective communication would have to zigzag through layer after layer of bureaucratic barrier and everyone in the organization work with little or no enthusiasm, creativity, imagination and innovation.

Imagine your employee who does not have the ability to see past their next assignment and chances are common questions would pop-up; “Who are we? Where are we going? How do I fit into the future of this company?

In a corporation with effective communication, it can advance into position in which knowledge can be put to productive use and expertise is interchanged throughout the company. It also means advancement for individuals results in advancement for the entire organization.

Would you like to have a stronger, healthier, more enjoyable marriage? I am sure that you would. And yet we live in a culture where about half of all marriages will shatter and end in a divorce, leaving behind the wreckage of broken adults and broken children.

If we are to build healthy marriages, we much do so “on purpose.” We cannot just hope that it will happen by accident. “Hope,” say the generals, “is not a good strategy.” Planning, work, and the investment of time, are much better strategies for any important endeavor of life. The first characteristic of a healthy marriage for us to consider is the way that we talk to our spouse, and the way that we talk about our spouse..

Healthy marriages are characterized by supportive, encouraging, and honest communication. We want to build each other up in our marriages, never tear our spouse down (especially under the guise of being “honest”). Two thousand years ago St. Paul wrote this verse that is worthy of every refrigerator door in America,

“Don’t let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up, according to what they need, so that you can benefit those who listen.” (Paul’s letter to the Ephesians, Chapter 4).

There are three important parts to Paul’s verse. First, that if we don’t have something good to say, don’t say anything at all. I think my mother told me that as well. Second, that we should consider our listener’s needs. My wife has a different set of needs than does my daughter, or my sons. We should consider how best to encourage and support that particular person. Finally, the purpose of our talking in the first place should be to benefit the listener.

When I first began to seriously apply Paul’s principle, and I began to really look at what I was saying, and why I was saying it, my vocabulary and my time talking were cut by about one-third. I had become sarcastic, but funny. But my funny sarcasm was always at the expense of another. When I determined to build others up and benefit them with my speech, I talked a lot less. But I became a much better person, both inside and out.

Check your motives. If you just want to make yourself look good, you will tend to be sarcastic, and you will tend to “tease” other people by degrading them in front of others. The consequences of this will be that your friends will see your “teasing” as shameful, and your spouse and your children will grow distant from you. It may cost you your marriage.

If , on the other hand, your motives are to build up and encourage your spouse and children, then speak words of support, love, and praise to them. Your friends will view you as a loving person, and your spouse and children will always want to be near you. They will love to hear you talk, as your words will be “like honey” to them.

So choose well how you will use your words. You have the power to build up, or to tear down, just by the choices that you make.

D.E. McFarland has defined Communication as the process of meaningful interaction among human beings. More specifically, it is the process by which meanings are perceived and understandings are reached among human being. But there may be some faults /barriers in the communication system that prevents the message from reaching the receiver, these barriers are as follows:-

1. Language Barrier; – Different languages, vocabulary, accent, dialect represents a national/ regional barriers. Semantic gaps are words having similar pronunciation but multiple meanings like- round; badly expressed message, wrong interpretation and unqualified assumptions. The use of difficult or inappropriate words/ poorly explained or misunderstood messages can result in confusion.

2. Cultural Barriers: – Age, education, gender, social status, economic position, cultural background, temperament, health, beauty, popularity, religion, political belief, ethics, values, motives, assumptions, aspirations, rules/regulations, standards, priorities can separate one person from another and create a barrier.

3. Individual Barrier: – It may be a result of an individual’s perceptual and personal discomfort. Even when two persons have experienced the same event their mental perception may/may not be identical which acts as a barrier. Style, selective perception, halo effect, poor attention and retention, defensiveness, close mindedness, insufficient filtration are the Individual or Psychological barrier.

4. Organizational Barrier: – It includes Poor Organization’s culture, climate, stringent rules, regulations, status, relationship, complexity, inadequate facilities/ opportunities of growth and improvement; whereas; the nature of the internal and external environment like large working areas physically separated from others, poor lightening, staff shortage, outdated equipments and background noise are Physical Organizational Barrier.

5. Interpersonal Barrier: – Barriers from Employers are :- Lack of Trust in employees; Lack of Knowledge of non-verbal clues like facial expression, body language, gestures, postures, eye contact; different experiences; shortage of time for employees; no consideration for employee needs; wish to capture authority; fear of losing power of control; bypassing and informational overloading, while Barriers from Employees includes Lack of Motivation, lack of co-operation, trust, fear of penalty and poor relationship with the employer.

6. Attitudinal Barrier: – It comes about as a result of problems with staff in the organisation. Limitation in physical and mental ability, intelligence, understanding, pre-conceived notions, and distrusted source divides the attention and create a mechanical barrier which affects the attitude and opinion.

7. Channel Barrier: – If the length of the communication is long, or the medium selected is inappropriate, the communication might break up; it can also be a result of the inter-personal conflicts between the sender and receiver; lack of interest to communicate; information sharing or access problems which can hamper the channel and affect the clarity, accuracy and effectiveness.

To communicate effectively one need to overcome these barriers. Working on breaking the barrier is a broad-brush activity and here are certain measures.

DO’S FOR BREAKING THE BARRIER:

- Allow employees access to resources, self expression and idea generation.

- Express your expectations to others.

- Use less of absolute words such as “never”, “always”, “forever”, etc.

- Be a good, attentive and active listener.

- Filter the information correctly before passing on to someone else.

- Try to establish one communication channel and eliminate the intermediaries.

- Use specific and accurate words which audiences can easily understand.

- Try and view the situations through the eyes of the speaker.

- The “you” attitude must be used on all occasions.

- Maintain eye contact with the speaker and make him comfortable.

- Write the instructions if the information is very detailed or complicated.

- Oral communication must be clear and not heavily accented.

- Avoid miscommunication of words and semantic noise.

- Ask for clarifications, repetition where necessary.

- Make the organisational structure more flexible, dynamic and transparent.

- Foster congenial relationship which strengths coordination between superior and subordinate.

- Focus on purposeful and well focused communication.

- The message of communication should be clear and practical.

- Get Proper Feedback.

DONT’S FOR BREAKING THE BARRIER:

- Be a Selective Listener, this is when a person hears another but selects not to hear what is being said by choice or desire to hear some other message.

- Be a “Fixer”, a fixer is a person that tries to find other person’s fault.

- Be a daydreamer.

- Use long chain of command for communication.

- Use too many technical jargons.

- Jump to conclusions immediately.

- Interrupt the speakers and distract him by asking too many irrelevant questions.

1. Say Hello to your neighbors, friends and family more. Even if you do not know the person, it is important and beneficial to maintain such a habit when maintaining relationships.

2. Make Eye Contact with as many people as possible. Especially if you are uncomfortable doing so. This is a good way to practice and get use to doing it more.

3. Use Body language especially when you are not good with words. This is another way to express your interest in relating with that person. (e.g. Hand wave, Smile, Hugs, Hand shake etc.)

4. Smile more with people around you as it is a more favorable look and attracts people your way. Smiles also help keep you looking younger by using your facial muscles more frequently.

5. Ask Questions when in doubt to avoid miscommunication.

6. Speak Clearly and repeat if needed to assure what you are saying is being understood by others.

7. Prepare to Listen as it is part of communicating with others in addition to speaking clearly.

8. Focus on key points of what is exactly is being said to you. Think nothing more or less. If you are not sure what message they are trying to relay, ask questions as mentioned above.

9. Avoid Assuming If you still have questions about what is being said. Take time to ask for clarity to avoid making assumptions that lead to misunderstanding.

10. Avoid Criticizing and focus more on understand where the person is coming from.

In today’s business environment, we rely more and more on technology to communicate with one another. Our ability to communicate has been greatly enhanced, and our choices for communication media are ever expanding. From cellular telephones, to Email, fax machines to Palm Pilots, communication devices are linked to the way we do business now more than ever before. This new technology has had many positive benefits for the business world. Unfortunately, since the range of options has expanded at such a quick rate, many people seem to be unaware of how best to use the devices they now have. It is essential to develop an awareness of how technology should best be used to avoid negative outcomes for employees and the workplace in general.

In the last two decades, communications technology in the United States has developed at an extremely rapid rate. Twenty years ago, people did not even know what “Email” was. Now, phrases like “IM me” or “Google it” are commonplace, household terms that seem inseparable from our personal or business lives. But most people don’t know how to properly use these new advances. Take Email for example, misuse of this medium has led to the demise of executives such as Credit Suisse First Boston tech banker Frank Quattrone, Merrill Lynch & Co. analyst Henry M. Blodgett, as well as senior executives from Enron.

The problem with some individuals is that they don’t realize that electronic communications can be and often are permanent. Even text messages can be stored and retrieved by the server processing them. But for most people, it’s not a matter of not realizing that sensitive, potentially career ruining information should not be sent willy-nilly, it’s just that they don’t know how to use electronic communication in a polite way. Just because we have these devices, does not grant us license to substitute rudeness for manners. There is a new code of electronic manners in using telephones, PDAs, laptop computers, faxes, and so on.

Here are 8 guidelines for communicating in an effective, respectful manner:

1. Don’t use your cell phone at inappropriate times, in inappropriate places, or in an inappropriate way. This invades others’ privacy and disrupts their ability to concentrate.

2. Don’t encroach on others’ personal space when using your laptop computer. There are appropriate times/places to connect and use your laptop and there are times when it is not appropriate.

3. Turn off your beeper and/or cell phone whenever you are in a situation where it could be distracting.

4. Don’t send lengthy faxes unless you first call the individual or business to ensure that it’s a good time

5. Only use the speaker phone when necessary, and always make sure the person you are talking to does not mind.

6. Never send e-mail that contains inappropriate or sensitive material (as some executives have learned the hard way).

7. Consider calling a person who you usually communicate with by e-mail from time to time to establish a more personal contact.

8. Avoid calling, paging, or faxing people at home or after hours, unless it is vital that you do so.

In today’s business world, we use technology to communicate with one another like never before. Communication has been greatly enhanced, and so have our options of how and when to communicate. This new technology has primarily been a good thing for the business world. However, many people seem unaware of how best to communicate in this modern age. Active awareness and following some type of guide to communication etiquette is essential for all people in today’s business world.

VOIP (Voice over internet protocol), is an innovative advanced technology that allows user to communicate with people via internet protocol. This unique telephony technology can effectively reduce the long distance call charges and provide a relatively less expensive method to communicate.

Thanks to this pioneering technology that has totally changed the conventional means of communication which are often very expensive. Nowadays, the advantages of VOIP are extensively being used in many big and small organizations. People from different fields are employing this service in their businesses as well as in homes. VOIP is also recognized by other technical names such as internet telephony, IP telephony and digital phone.

Although, the names of do not matter, what matters a lot is the function, uniqueness, advantages and low cost of using this technology. There are various benefits and you can utilize all of them by simply using this technology via internet. Generally, for enabling VOIP service in your home or business you just need a personal computer, VOIP phone and internet connection.

No doubt, by using the technology you can get varied advantages in form of low cost calls, ability to stay in touch with the wide spread people, ability to call any geographical location and many more.

Though, besides its benefits there are some drawbacks also, which you may face while using its services, for example, poor signal reception, security theft and any disruption in VOIP phone etc. However, as the popularity of VOIP is increasingly catching attention of the worldwide people, it is constantly improving day by day so that it can serve its 100% to its users.

There are many providers from whom you can get VOIP service and they can easily connect your internet connection with the phone. Therefore, if you really want to save your huge expenses on the long distance phone calls then just enable the services of VOIP technology.